I have a very dear friend who is constantly amazing me. She has a lot on her plate and manages to write an incredibly thoughtful and insightful blog on top of everything else going on in her life. I am humbled. Honestly, I don't know how she manages all the balls she's got up in the air.
I have just finished reading a book that she recommended to me about Brooke Shields' journey through post-partum depression. What an eye opener! While reading it, her inner voice of post-partum depression sounded almost identical to the crummy inner voice I had listened to just after Andy was born. I can't tell you how terrifying and sickening it had been to feel the way I did at the time. I'm so thankful that I had a very mild case and managed to come through it okay. But I can understand how it is completely out of one's control whether or not they 'pull through' the darkness.
I find it difficult to admit, even to myself, how bad things had been. I recall driving along a section of River Road where many years ago a colleague from an airline I had worked for at the time, had gone off the road and drowned. The thought had occurred to me at the time that it would be so easy to just slip off the road... This was just one of many occurrences of these terrible thoughts. I will not elaborate on the others. As Brooke had said in her book, she had envisioned terrible things happening to her little Rowan, I had also envisioned terrible things happening to baby Andy. I'm just so grateful that time is over - although the post-partum depression can occur at any time during the first year after delivery. Theoretically I'm not quite out of the woods yet. My doctor questioned me about post-partum depression when I took Andy in for a checkup - perhaps I shouldn't have dismissed his enquiries so quickly. Maybe he could see something in me that I wasn't acknowledging.
Anyway, now that the lousy inner voice has stopped and my own inner voice has returned, I hope to begin functioning a bit better. If I can achieve half of what my close friend is accomplishing I'll be quite happy.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Check Out My New Blog
I'm so excited about making a busy book for our little Andy. The intention is to create a fun activity book to keep his hands and mind busy during otherwise dull moments of the day.
My dear Mum allowed me free reign to pilfer craft items from her stash, so I've got many fantastic odds and ends to incorporate into the book. In my rare spare moments I can be found happily working in my craft room ironing, piecing, sewing, etc.
Here’s the link if you’re interested in checking it out: http://keepinthelittleguybusy.blogspot.com/
I haven’t posted any photos yet, but they’ll be up in the next day or two.
My dear Mum allowed me free reign to pilfer craft items from her stash, so I've got many fantastic odds and ends to incorporate into the book. In my rare spare moments I can be found happily working in my craft room ironing, piecing, sewing, etc.
Here’s the link if you’re interested in checking it out: http://keepinthelittleguybusy.blogspot.com/
I haven’t posted any photos yet, but they’ll be up in the next day or two.
Zippy
I spent a wonderful evening with Daniel last night. Scouts Canada was hosting an open house at his school, so we went to check it out. Among the activities set up was a zip line. Daniel's jaw dropped the first time he saw a child zoom by, suspended from a cable, literally flying from one tree to another. All the other activities paled in comparison.
Now, Daniel's a wonderful, caring, clever boy, but he's always held back a little when it comes to trying new physical activities. I could see that he wanted to try, but was very nervous about the zip line. "That looks like so much fun! Look Daniel, there's Marcus from the other Grade One class, join him in the line." But Daniel's not one to be so easily coerced. He had to do it on his own terms.
Step One: ASK PERMISSION
Although it looked like just about anyone could go for a ride, he insisted on getting permission from one of the Leaders. I suppose that because he's a people-person, talking to someone about it, rather than tackling the physical thing head on, was less intimidating for him.
Step Two: AVOID GETTING SCHMUCKED
Now that permission had been obtained, the race was on to get into the lineup. Without thinking about his surroundings, he bolted towards the lineup. The timing couldn't have been worse. As Daniel ran underneath the line, a child came whizzing directly towards him at break-neck speed... "Look out Daniel!!! Out of the way!"
Step Three: WAITING IN LINE
This was a very tricky step. A seven-year-old has a difficult time waiting in line at the best of times, but for an excited seven-year-old this was almost impossible. A couple of issues arose: avoiding getting whacked by zip line users and retaining his position in the lineup.
Step Four: FEAR FACTOR
Once up on the platform (built using a couple of large wooden boxes stacked on slightly uneven ground causing a very small wiggle to the pile) Daniel had a very difficult time overcoming his fear of ... well something. The Leader offered to let him sit on his shoulder to help him put his legs through the zip line sling. It was a bit of a difficult stretch getting his legs through the sling while holding on tightly with both hands. After a lot of convincing and three adults' help, Daniel was ready - ZIIIIIIPPPPPP....
Step Five: LANDING
...schrunnnnnnnnnnnn. Unfortunately, he didn't quite get his legs far enough through the sling and his bum ended up being dragged along the grass prior to stopping. However, this didn't dampen his enthusiasm or diminish his smile. He immediately ran back and rejoined the lineup.
So, while I completed some paperwork to register him for the Fall, he rode the zip line a total of FIVE times! Way to go Daniel! I'm so proud of you for overcoming your fears and trying something new.
By the way, does anyone have any surefire method for removing grass stains from jeans?
Now, Daniel's a wonderful, caring, clever boy, but he's always held back a little when it comes to trying new physical activities. I could see that he wanted to try, but was very nervous about the zip line. "That looks like so much fun! Look Daniel, there's Marcus from the other Grade One class, join him in the line." But Daniel's not one to be so easily coerced. He had to do it on his own terms.
Step One: ASK PERMISSION
Although it looked like just about anyone could go for a ride, he insisted on getting permission from one of the Leaders. I suppose that because he's a people-person, talking to someone about it, rather than tackling the physical thing head on, was less intimidating for him.
Step Two: AVOID GETTING SCHMUCKED
Now that permission had been obtained, the race was on to get into the lineup. Without thinking about his surroundings, he bolted towards the lineup. The timing couldn't have been worse. As Daniel ran underneath the line, a child came whizzing directly towards him at break-neck speed... "Look out Daniel!!! Out of the way!"
Step Three: WAITING IN LINE
This was a very tricky step. A seven-year-old has a difficult time waiting in line at the best of times, but for an excited seven-year-old this was almost impossible. A couple of issues arose: avoiding getting whacked by zip line users and retaining his position in the lineup.
Step Four: FEAR FACTOR
Once up on the platform (built using a couple of large wooden boxes stacked on slightly uneven ground causing a very small wiggle to the pile) Daniel had a very difficult time overcoming his fear of ... well something. The Leader offered to let him sit on his shoulder to help him put his legs through the zip line sling. It was a bit of a difficult stretch getting his legs through the sling while holding on tightly with both hands. After a lot of convincing and three adults' help, Daniel was ready - ZIIIIIIPPPPPP....
Step Five: LANDING
...schrunnnnnnnnnnnn. Unfortunately, he didn't quite get his legs far enough through the sling and his bum ended up being dragged along the grass prior to stopping. However, this didn't dampen his enthusiasm or diminish his smile. He immediately ran back and rejoined the lineup.
So, while I completed some paperwork to register him for the Fall, he rode the zip line a total of FIVE times! Way to go Daniel! I'm so proud of you for overcoming your fears and trying something new.
By the way, does anyone have any surefire method for removing grass stains from jeans?
Friday, June 3, 2011
What the ....?
As you all know, I've got a little guy. He's still nursing, so while I'm at work I pump milk for him to drink later.
The usual routine is that after lunch I close my office door and do my thing. No big deal - most of the people in the office know I'll be done in about half an hour. Well, the other day I had an electrician come in to rewire our office for a new server. So he's crawling all over the place, including the ceiling. Well, when I sat down at my desk to pump, I didn't realize that two of my ceiling tiles were missing. Within a few minutes some wires started to descend into my office and when I looked up there was the electrician. Yikes!
He scurried away as quickly as he could. I almost laughed out loud at the situation. No wonder when he came back to the office the next day to do the last little bit of wiring he came and went before I even got into the office that day.
The usual routine is that after lunch I close my office door and do my thing. No big deal - most of the people in the office know I'll be done in about half an hour. Well, the other day I had an electrician come in to rewire our office for a new server. So he's crawling all over the place, including the ceiling. Well, when I sat down at my desk to pump, I didn't realize that two of my ceiling tiles were missing. Within a few minutes some wires started to descend into my office and when I looked up there was the electrician. Yikes!
He scurried away as quickly as he could. I almost laughed out loud at the situation. No wonder when he came back to the office the next day to do the last little bit of wiring he came and went before I even got into the office that day.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Wallet... Where?
Oh my goodness. Where to begin? My wallet sprouts legs on a regular basis these days. One would think that in some deep part of my soul I was wishing to get rid of it. Or perhaps I'm longing for a new life, as my wallet pretty much sums up my existence.
One day last week I grabbed subs for dinner and when I picked up the bag of sandwiches and turned to leave I completely forgot about my wallet, which remained on the counter for anybody to take. Yikes! Luckily the woman working behind the counter spotted my wallet and tucked it into the back office for safe keeping. (thank-you thank-you thank-you)
The following night, after meeting up with a dear friend and her eldest two children, I misplaced my wallet again. Ughhhh. This time it slipped between the seat and the console in our van. I realized it was missing when I went to retrieve some change for a 'hot lunch' for Daniel.
Not that I'm particularly superstitious, but these things seem to happen in threes. I'm wait in fear for the third time I misplace my wallet. With any luck it will turn up again as easily as it did the first two times. Fingers crossed.
One day last week I grabbed subs for dinner and when I picked up the bag of sandwiches and turned to leave I completely forgot about my wallet, which remained on the counter for anybody to take. Yikes! Luckily the woman working behind the counter spotted my wallet and tucked it into the back office for safe keeping. (thank-you thank-you thank-you)
The following night, after meeting up with a dear friend and her eldest two children, I misplaced my wallet again. Ughhhh. This time it slipped between the seat and the console in our van. I realized it was missing when I went to retrieve some change for a 'hot lunch' for Daniel.
Not that I'm particularly superstitious, but these things seem to happen in threes. I'm wait in fear for the third time I misplace my wallet. With any luck it will turn up again as easily as it did the first two times. Fingers crossed.
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